Zille Defeu’s Fetish Fantasies

Related, I think, to the crying article, is one from the BBC:

Being in touch with your emotions helps in the bedroom

Women who are more “emotionally intelligent” get greater pleasure from sex, research on twins suggests.

A study of more than 2,000 female twins showed that those with greater emotional intelligence had larger numbers of orgasms.

These women were better able to monitor their own and others’ feelings and emotions, which is key, say the King’s College London investigators. Their findings appear in The Journal of Sexual Medicine.

All of the 2,035 participants completed questionnaires giving details of their sexual behaviour and performance and also answered questions designed to test their emotional intelligence.

The research found a significant association between emotional intelligence and the frequency of orgasm during masturbation and intercourse.

Professor Tim Spector, director of the Twin Research Department at King’s College London and co-author of the study, said: “These findings show that emotional intelligence is an advantage in many aspects of your life including the bedroom.

“This study will help enormously in the development of behavioural and cognitive therapies to improve women’s sexual lives.”

Up to a third of women find it difficult or impossible to reach a climax during sex.

Lead author Andrea Burri said: “Emotional intelligence seems to have a direct impact on women’s sexual functioning by influencing her ability to communicate her sexual expectations and desires to her partner.”

She added that there was a possible connection with a woman’s ability to fantasise during sex or her feeling of control over the act.

Paula Hall, a sexual psychotherapist for Relate, said: “Emotional intelligence is most important in terms of overcoming problems.

“Most women, and men for that matter, will have this problem at some stage in their life. It’s often situational – you are tired or stressed or having relationship problems, for example.

“It’s not just about technique and the environment being right.

“If you are aware of your own emotions and can identify the issues and communicate them, you are more likely to be able to resolve the difficulty.”

Article from: http://news.bbc.co.uk/2/hi/health/8044571.stm | Picture from: SexAndSubmission.com

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It’s been said before — I’m not making a new point here, but I think this research does back it up! — that spankos (and BDSM practitioners) have had to become more “emotionally intelligent” to get what they want/need sexually and emotionally. And that is why we tend to have more fulfilling sex (however we define sex) — because we’ve put in the work to figure out our sexualities and emotional needs, so we both know how to ask for what we want, and we can get into our partner’s heads better, too, which means a better, more satisfying time for everyone involved!

I think a moment of smugness for being such superior people is called for! [radiates smugness] Okay, now on with our day…!