Zille Defeu’s Fetish Fantasies

So, after Mystery Minx and my Master (Now if we can get Miss Maggie Mayhem to join us, we’ll have some serious alliteration happening! Also, I can’t imagine how much trouble we would all get in! My Master would have to call for back-up!) came down to join me at the café, we all went out for lunch. If you have not had lunch with Mystery Minx, it’s an experience worth having! She spent the whole time zinging rubber bands at my Master and just generally being an adorable brat. It was like dinner and a floor show!

After lunch, it was back to our apartment, and as you have read, the Minx got herself in more trouble (do not hand that girl a water pistol, or you will, damply, live to regret it!) And then she put up resistance to going to the bedroom for the disciplining she’d more than earned, and I got to watch a fabulous full-on brat scene – and take notes! And so I sat down to write that first entry, getting more and more fascinated by the sounds emanating from the other room.

They came out and joined me in a while, but our Minx was not in the least subjugated, or even slightly regretful, and water pistols and rubber bands kept being fired. Also, a spontaneous wrestling session ended up knocking us off the sofa at one point, and then even I got to take the clothes brush to her bottom, as my Master held her down!

This led, eventually, to both of us in the bedroom, and I watched the stubborn Minx getting her next round of discipline. She was very stoical, and took what she’d gotten herself in for with just decorative protests. I was called in to hold her arms while she took a pretty intense caning, and I held her firmly, but gave her encouraging squeezes in between the strokes. You can’t help but feel as comrades in such a situation, and I winced with each stroke. Afterwards, I gave her such a big hug – I was as proud of her as a mama duck would be with a duckling!

We’d all gotten up quite an appetite, so some Korean take-away was in order. We all sat down to watch St Trinian’s (which she’d never seen!) but she got fidgety and got her hands on a water pistol again.

So it was back to the bedroom for a final disciplinary session, the last several having clearly not done the trick! This time I was just watching, and she got taken through a range of spanking, strapping, some of the short cane OTK, and more spanking, until finally the floodgates opened and my Master held her as she let her emotions out, and apologized for being a bad girl. I couldn’t stay away at that point, and joined in the cuddle, and we all ended up in this lovely place, holding each other, with everyone sated, and with the lovely feeling of sharing something so intimate with someone. And, since it was the three of us, all snuggled up on the bed, it was so much … more than it would be with just two people. At one point, her face was resting on my chest, and I could feel her breathing, and I was stroking her hair and I thought to myself, “This is just as good as sex ever gets, just as rewarding and intense. What It Is That We Do is such a beautiful, wonderful thing!”

Now you could say I was high on a cocktail of happy brain chemicals, and you’d be right, but the fact is that the cold light of day hasn’t changed my mind.

When I started having sex (at age 15) and all through high school and college, I used sex to get intimacy and intensity. I knew I wanted something, and I thought sex was it. I just assumed I was an insatiable nymphomaniac, and I was fine with that – hell, I was proud of it!

It’s only been since being with my Master that I’ve truly learned that it’s not all about sex. My ex, Bear, started the turning point, when he helped me see that I’m not a sex-slut, I’m an intimacy-slut. That is, when I crave intimacy, I’ve always turned to sex to get it. But Bear wasn’t kinky, and he couldn’t help me get to the next step. That my Master has showed me, that I can find the intimacy I need through the profound intimate act of accepting discipline. A caning can make my Master and me feel as connected and satisfied as sex ever could – indeed, it’s seldom that we engage in sex without some form of spanking!

I had always seen “S/M” as basically foreplay – stuff that spices up sex. This evening really drove home to me how much my point of view had changed: that spanking/CP is not the appetizer, but the dinner (sometimes the multi-course meal!) and sex is dessert – it’s yummy, but you don’t really need it to have a great meal!

And there were more experiences on the way! You’ll note that my bottom was untouched in all of this … well, wait ‘till Saturday and Sunday! (Wherein, to use the metaphor above, I feasted…!)

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