Zille Defeu’s Fetish Fantasies

Hey all,

It’s been a pretty chaotic time for me, and I’m unsure when it’s going to mellow out, so my blogging is going to be random at best. (For those who care, I’ll probably be writing about it in my other blog at some point, but all you really need to know is that it’s family stuff — once that is said, anyone can understand!)

Here is a meme I’ve been working on, a question at a time, over the past mumble days. (Which I got from My Bottom Smarts — thanks Bonnie!) To keep people’s ears (eyes?) perked up, I shall intersperse images from Miss Maggie Mayhem’s recent super sexy shoot for “Everything Butt.” (And because I like looking at them — it’s as much for me as for you!)

1. Would you rather be spanked outside in a cold woodshed or inside by a cosy fire? Oh, cold is bad, baaaad! It’s not the idea of the woodshed – that’s certainly got its place in fantasy-land. But when I get cold I really just want to have a cuppa tea and snuggle up in a warm blankie, not get a spanking!

2. Would you rather be spanked in public or in private? I don’t mind the kind of public that is a fetish event or spanking party – and I was even flogged in the middle of the Folsom Street Fair. But I’m not okay with making vanilla people watch my kinky antics – it’s non-consensual! They didn’t ask to see that sort of thing, and I think it’s unfair to assume they want to. But as long as I know I’m someplace where everyone is on the same page, then public or private don’t matter to me!

3. Would you rather fantasize about spanking or actually be spanked? Well, fantasies are lovely, but reality is more fun!

4. Would you rather be spanked for your humiliation or for your spanker’s pleasure? Why does this have to be an “or”? I assume we’re both here for the same thing!

5. Would you rather be spanked by hand or by hairbrush? Hand, every time. But try replacing “hairbrush” with “belt” or “cane”….

6. Would you rather be spanked by belt or by cane? Heh. I hadn’t even read this question when I answered the one above! It would be a sad world if I could only have one of these!

7. Would you rather be spanked by paddle or riding crop? Well, that’s an easy one! I adore the riding crop, and hate the paddle with a passion!

8. Would you rather be restrained or unrestrained during your spanking? It depends on what the role-play or reality calls for. You generally wouldn’t tie down a schoolgirl who’s getting six of the best. But there’s times I really want some bondage in the mix! It’s nice to know that you can’t go anywhere, that you can just give in to the pain and not have to worry about holding yourself in position!

9. Would you rather be spanked until you cried or until you are aroused? I’m always aroused by a spanking – even punishment paddlings that I have trouble making it through – I might be crying and upset, but my pussy will still be wet! As for my face getting wet – I prefer that I am spanked to tears, whenever possible/practical. But it’s generally not hard to make me cry.

10. Would you rather have just a red bottom or welts/bruises? To be honest, I’d prefer the reddened botty, because then you’re good to go again (i.e., sans bruising) the next day, or even a few hours later. But I want the intensity that only comes with weals….

11. Would you rather be spanked for the naughty things you have done or just because you enjoy the experience? The former. If it’s in role-play, it’s just good fun. If it’s real, then the catharsis is vital to me.

12. Would you rather be spanked with pants up/skirt down or pants down/skirt up? Depends on the implement. For a hand spanking, I think it’s best not to have too much fabric in the way. But for the paddle or heavier canes, it makes them more “do-able” for longer.

13. Would you rather be spanked with panties up or panties down? Oh, I just read “pants” in the Brit way, and so I thought I already answered this! Anyway, there is a power to the taking down of the panties, so it can be good to start a punishment with them up, and then at some point take them down. Especially if you are already hurting, and then that last layer of “protection” is taken away from you.

14. Would you rather be spanked somewhat clothed or entirely naked? I like the partially clothed thing because it feels somehow naughtier than naked. And in most role-play scenes we do, it’s more appropriate, too.

15. Would you rather your spanking be strictly disciplinarian or sexually attractive in nature? Even a punishment is sexualized in my mind, although in the case of punishment, it’s before and after that I find it sexy – not actually during it! But I do adore sex after a spanking.

16. Would you rather be spanked by a male or by a female? Masculine types, male or female, are top of my list. After that, high femmes (the librarian in pencil skirt and blazer and heels, say….)

17. Would you rather be cuddled or scolded after your spanking? Um, if it’s my preference, I’d like the punishment to be concluded and put behind us when the spanking ends.

18. Would you rather be spanked OTK or bent over a table/chair? They both are equally hot.

19. Would you rather your spanker have physical contact with you? Generally, but there are scenes where that doesn’t make sense, so it would be awkward and get in the way.

20. Would you prefer to be spanked in the woods with a tree branch, bent over the hood of a car, or in a school with a ruler bent over the desk of your teacher/principal? Again with this “or.” All of the above, darn it!

21. Would you rather be a brat to your spanker to deserve a spanking or simply ask your spanker for a spanking because you know you needed it? It depends on the scene, or the headspaces we are both in. Sometimes my Master wants a bratty little girl to give him a good reason to spank her. Sometimes he really doesn’t want me bratting him. And I sometimes like letting my inner brat out, but sometimes I want to be a good girl in a bad situation….

22. Have you received a spanking in the past week? No, sadly. My bottom was still recovering from a pretty serious weekend, and while it’s healed up now, this weekend was very busy with family issues. I always say that, “Life tries to get in the way,” of play, and that in a committed relationship, you have to fight back and make the fun stuff happen. Life has been winning, recently.

23. Would you rather be spanked for the physical pleasure or the emotional release? This is the silliest of the “or” questions! Without one, the other is so much lessened! The only time there is no physical pleasure for me is when I am being truly punished, and that’s not something to which you can relate a “would you rather…”!

24. Would you rather tell your best friends you enjoy be spanked or keep it secret? I don’t think someone could be my “best friend” and not know such things about me!

25. Would you rather spanking be a lifestyle choice or just something you dabble in? Um, I live in a 24/7 Master/slave relationship, and even though that is our odd definition of it, it’s still very much a lifestyle!

26. Would you rather your lover be a vanilla or a spankoholic too? I could not have married my husband and Master if he had not been a spanko!

27. Would you rather be spanked by a stranger or by someone who knew you well? Another silly “or” question! Both! They are very different experiences!

28. Would you rather be spanked by despotic, mean person or by a compassionate, benevolent person? It really just depends on the scene. I sometimes need a spanking from my Daddy, because it’s in my best interest. Other times, I want a classic Bad Guy to do terrible things to me!

29. Would you rather be talked to while you are spanked or no talking at all? Oh, the talk is one of the best things! That’s like asking, “Would you like foreplay with your sex, or no foreplay at all?”

30. Would you rather get one swat at a time with pauses to let the sting set in or a continuous tanning to build up the fire? Both, either, whatever fits the scene best.

31. Would you rather be forced into a spanking or willingly submit into a spanking? Generally, I’d rather there be at least some aspect of coercion, but I’d really like to be tied down and forced entirely sometime!

32. Would you rather have a safe word or be pushed beyond your preconceived limits? This is a really stupid “or.” The point of a safeword is that you can safely push at your preconceived limits! That said, I don’t actually have a safeword with my Master, but I would with anyone else I played with.

33. Would you rather your spanker know your spanking history or is ignorance bliss? Information is power. I like the people who spank me to have power over me!

34. Would you rather be spanked by multiple people at one time or just by one person at one time? Why is there not an option for, “One after another after another…”?

35. Would you rather be spanked once a day or once every few months? Well, I’d love to be spanked everyday, but that’s not the best thing for one’s body, or for keeping things from getting old. So really, once or twice a week sounds good to me!

36. Would you rather your spanker be deeply in tune or be totally unaffected to your experience as a spankee? For most scenes, I need the spanker to be very connected to what I am experiencing, so that I can feel safe. Someday, however, I want to do a scene with my Master where he gags me and puts my head in a hood, and ties me down, and then just gets the chance to do whatever he wants, without having to always be concerned with what I am going though; something I know preoccupies him for all of our scenes.

37. Would you rather a closer physical relationship or a closer emotional relationship with your spanker? These “ors” are driving me crazy! Duh, both!

38. Would you rather your spanker ice your bottom down after a spanking or send you to the corner to display his/her accomplishment? Depends on how bad the spanking was! Sometimes, after being caned and tawsed and god knows what else, I really need the comfort of the icing, because in the post-scene sub-drop, I get all freaked out about the extent of the bruising.

39. Would you rather your spanker be the person you wish to live the rest of your life with (i.e. marriage) or the person you can call on when your tushy tickles? I broke up with my ex, Bear, to be with my Master, because Bear didn’t spank me. ‘Nough said? But I also like the idea of booty calls (literally!)

40. Would you rather spanking be a part of love making or not a part of love making? Here we are with that dratted “or,” again. Both have their place, for me!

41. Would you rather your spanker have total control over you when you are being spanked or do you still want to have some control while you are being spanked? My Master has total control. Anyone else gets a safeword!

42. Would you rather be humiliated or respected during your spanking? While humiliation is hot and is generally the order of the day, those scenes where my Master lets me know how proud of me he is for taking my licks can bring me intense emotional release (as in, I sob up a storm and cling to him!)

43. Would you rather spanking become part of a bigger BDSM alternative lifestyle or spanking just be spanking for spanking sake? Why and how could I have anything to do with that?! But for the record, I wish spankos would not be so ticked off at being included with the whips-n-chains people, and I wish the BDSM folk would give spankos the respect (and space for their own identity) they deserve.

44. Would you rather be filmed during a spanking to share your exhibitionist naughtiness or are you too modest to show your bum to the world? Do I need to answer that? Seriously.

45. Would you rather your spanking be gentle and gradual or painful and abrupt? It depends upon the circumstances surrounding the spanking.

46. Would you rather be defiant or fearful going into a spanking? Either, both, neither – it’s all got its place!

47. Would you rather be spanked exclusively in your own bedroom or anyplace else other than your own bedroom? I do like making sure that we’ve tried out everywhere in our home, as well as every possible surface in a hotel room. But mostly, I prefer our bedroom! This may change when we get our own house, and can build a playroom!

48. Would you rather be spanked exclusively on your bottom or other places could be interesting too? Well, if this is a case of “rather,” the only place I’d “rather” also be spanked is my pussy. I really get off on those sensations. I’d never rather be spanked on my thighs (front or back) or strapped on my hand or caned on my feet. But these things happen, and it’s not like I can do much to change it!

49. Would you rather a spanking be a surprise or be something you have to look forward to? I love surprises! But I also like planning detailed scenes! The planning becomes foreplay!

50. Would you rather spanking be a part of role playing kinkiness or a response to events that have happened in reality? Role-playing kinkiness is always a fun and light-hearted thing with us (although some scenes can get pretty intense, it still can all be over in the drop of a hat, if needed.) A response to events generally means I’m getting punished, which is neither fun nor light-hearted!

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