What is this blog about?
August 21st, 2008 | Author: Zille
It’s really funny, everyone who links to me puts me in a different category, depending on what my recent blog posts have been about.
- If I’ve been putting up some of the pictures from my modeling days, they put me under “spanking model,” or “fetish model.”
- If I’m linking to spanking blogs and classic spanking videos, then I’m put in the “general spanking” category.
- If I’ve been talking about my M/s relationship, then this blog is a “Master slave blog.” (Or even, a “blog about master/servant relationships” — Oh well, at least he thinks it’s “fascinating”!)*
Back when I did DarkPlay.net , I knew the site was never going to be a commercial success the way it was a critically acclaimed artistic success because I was too diversified: I did spanking shoots, and every fetish you could imagine, and sometimes just vanilla stuff like a nice lesbian threesome or what-have-you. And people looking for porn generally want the one thing they want: spanking, hold the latex. Or hardcore bondage, and don’t let’s see that boring vanilla twaddle! Or feet and stockings; what are you bothering with this other stuff for? Or, if it don’t involve pee, it ain’t for me!
But I thought when I started doing this blog that I had managed to concentrate my varied kinky interests into the specific and most vital ones. I don’t write here about the tentacle monster anime that I love. I’ve been in erotic cannibalism fetish shoots, and vampiric blood-drinking shoots. But what I post here is spanking stuff (and yes, some bondage, but they go together like chocolate and peanut butter!)
But now I wonder: am I still too diversified? Are the spankos turned off because I’m in an M/s relationship? Are the M/s people bored with my blog because my Master and I do more spanking and Daddy/girl stuff and less high Gorean protocol? Do the “real” people not trust me because I’ve been a porn model?** (And I don’t even have to ask if the domestic discipline people sniff and look down their noses at me because I’m unashamedly into various aspects of BDSM — okay, okay, all the aspects.)
Do I just not fit in anywhere?
Bah. I don’t know. I think I’m coming down with something; I have a sore throat and a fever. Undoubtedly this is just me feeling down because I don’t feel well, and I’ll be back to being your chipper kinky blogger soon.
* Really, I should just be appreciative that he linked to me in the first place — he could easily have just linked to the website itself. And Depeche Mode has a really great song called “Master and Servant.”
**I have always loved that because I was a pro-model, I thus somehow lost my “realness.” I must now be an imaginary person. Indeed, every pro-model, be she a porn model, fetish model, or fashion model must just actually be a figment of a sort of mass hallucination!
Northern Spanking
I Feel Myself.com
Hope you have...
I categorize you as “friend I wish I hadn’t lost touch with” or “my friend who is cooler than I will ever be, and knows more about sex than everyone else I know combined”…
You have transcended categories and experience the whole. Perhaps you see things as they really are, connected and in a constant state of flux and interplay, rather than as categories lacking contact with each other.
I call this one of my all time favourite blogs that must be checked several times a day! Now on my blog feed so I can see when updated. Also thank you so much for the blow job instructions,Master will be very pleased if I can get over my gag reflex!
Hey Ian — goodness, I didn’t realize you were still reading me! Lovely to see you around here!
I’ll email you!
Windwalker — thank you for the beautiful compliment! However, transcending categories doesn’t help much when I’m trying to get this site to make me enough money that I don’t have to go get a real job! People like their categories, and people on the internet esp. have the attention span of gnats. Gnats with ADD. What I write about in this blog doesn’t limit me (I am more than this blog, obviously) but maybe I need to limit what I write about in this blog… (le sigh) I hope not!
Scunge — wow, what a fabulous compliment! I’m only sorry I don’t manage to update more than once a day for you!
I hope you and your Master enjoy not just the end result of mellowing out your gag reflex, but also the process of getting there! 
Zille, marketing-wise, I think it’s true your breadth of diversity is costing you audience. The first time or two I was here I really didn’t recognize that it was something I would be interested in. I read mostly spanking stuff, but I do branch out into BDSM for your blog and for kinkerbelle’s. But feel free to do what you like here, that’s what blogs are for!
So let me get this straight.
You are a domistically disciplined spankable little girl latex covered submissive former fetish porn model with occasional lesbian tendancies who blogs for a living that thinks she doesn’t fit in anywhere?
News Flash!
You are really an articulate sexy author who shares aspects of her personal and professional life through your blog for fun (and hopefully profit). You are a real as the rest of us here on the Interweb
Oh yeah, we all diss Gorean high protocol, just ask Alebeard.
I think your blog is win-win for us ADD gnats. So whens the post on anime tentacle porn?
Get well soon, I miss teasing you
If I were going to link to you, I would file you under ‘adult’. Actually, if my bookmarks are any indication it would be Adult > Girls (Other options are Stories and Artists). Yeah, I’m pretty generic in my labelling. All of which means nothing anyway as it is against my AUP to link to you at all.
Zille, your blog is amazing. I have searched from site to site trying to find blogs that are interesting . Yours certainly fits the bill. I love reading about all these different aspects of you. The main reason is because you are so honest and open. I truly appreciate your blog and I hope you continue inviting us into your life.
Zille, as far as I’m concerned you are a fascinating and intelligent woman who writes about many of the things that interest me.
I’m not concerned about categories, mainly about people.
I hope that you are feeling better soon.
Love and warm hugs,
Paul.
I started reading your blog back in the LJ days, following a link off of the Skin Two site I think. As much as anything I liked it because of the pseudo-victorian style you had going on in the blog design back then. Still miss that actually.
For me the most interesting entries are those where you’re talking about D/s in some form – whether that’s the heavy slave stuff or other activities such as Daddy play or spanking. You write very cogently on the topic, and have helped me to work through my own thoughts on the topic at times, which is always appreciated. I’m certainly not “put off” by the other entries though – I’m just less likely to click through when they pop up in my feed.
Karl — thanks for your honesty — yes, that’s what I was afraid of. Maybe I should have made several blogs: a spanking blog, a M/s blog, a fetish blog, and updated them seperately! But since zilledefeu.com is so far along, now, it’s probably too late!
Fyre — awww, you can be so sweet when you’re not teasing me!
And I know most non-Gorean people tend to use Gor-folk as the butt of jokes. It’s just too easy!
The “occasional lesbian tendancies” made me chuckle — thanks, I needed some laughing in my day! I guess no one who reads this blog would believe it, but I did spend seven years in a primary relationship with a woman (she’s the “A.” I refer to on this blog) and was once the queen of lesbian BDSM porn on the internet. If you google “lesbian BDSM,” DarkPlay.net is still number eight on the page (it was in first or second place during the five years with the site *I* maintained the site, mais bien sur!) And if you google my name, you still get results like, “I knew for certain the moment I read her name that Zille Defeu was one of those sexy lesbian vampires,” or, “For real-life Bay Area lesbian couple Alexi and Zille Defeu, making Web porn is a family business.”
Bill — I’m just glad you keep up with me!
db — Thank you so much, and you don’t worry — I am addicted to blogging, and cannot do it but honestly and openly!
Paul — You, my friend, are a rarity, and thus precious!
(Although, I must say, I’m also spoiled by the other people who have stepped up to respond to this post as well!)
The_Falconer — Thanks for your compliments, and for sticking around, and I’ll keep the Victorian-y design for a future site make-over!
Hope you feel better today. I’ve never felt the need to categorize you, but if I did, you would be category Zille, unique and very special with one of the best blogs on the web
I dig your blog ‘cuz it’s unique. It’s diverse, smart and surprising.
dont’ worry about what labels you might fall under or blog categories. just keep doing your thing
Dave.
Wow, Sarah — that’s a serious compliment! Thank you!
And Dave — thank you very much as well. I know you’ve seen a lot of spanking (or otherwise kinky) blogs, so your words mean a lot to me!